Do you ever wonder what goes through a child's mind when he decides to smear poo on the wall or worse, use a clean white towel to wipe the poo? Yeah, I know I am going where no one wants to go.
Deal with it.
Or you could just skip past this part. It's your choice. Really.
Last chance to bypass the poo.
The other day I was in the boys' bathroom and I notice a yucky, what-no-one-wants-to-find smear on the wall. I knew what it was immediately. I have kids. Kids do weird things. Really weird things. Gross things too.
I reach down for the Clorox wipes, thinking for the millionth time how wonderful Clorox is for inventing this minor convenience and how lucky I am for living in this century because really I don't think I could have made it in the era before me with all the clothe diapers and hand washing of the clothes. Laura Engalls I am not.
I proceed to clean the smear. I notice the once clean white towel on the floor and pick it up to hang it back on the rack. I find more of these smears which lead me to further inspect the bathroom. The white rug has also been violated.
As I gather up the contaminated items for a good bleach wash, I am wondering what goes through the mind of a child as he is wiping poo on a fresh white towel.
So I ask and get this answer: "It wouldn't come off! I couldn't get it to come off!" Very matter of fact. Oh the sweet innocence of a child.
I look at the boy who is actually wearing an exasperated look on his face and I mention that he could have just used more toilet paper and in the future please do not use the clean white linens to wipe ones bum.
I get a grim "yes mommy" in reply with a shuffling of the feet as he heads in the opposite direction.
"Hey! Did you wash your hands?" I ask as he shuffles away.
I don't even get a reply from the boy, just a gruff noise as he heads into the bathroom to wash his hands.
So far no signs of a repeat, but I am certain it will happen again. There are three of them.
POO PART DONE!! FOR THOSE WHO SKIPPED AHEAD!!
Elijah is scheduled to have his tonsils removed on December 7th. Send him love that day. I am sure he will need it. We borrowed a book from the library about a kid who gets her tonsils removed.
Like the book I may just make Elijah a 'Good-bye Tonsils' cake and have a party for them. Weird I know. We mothers do weird things. Must be where the kids get it right? No not that weird. I know what you are thinking and I have long since left any smears on walls!! Just like Trix, it's for kids. And maybe crazy people. Of course you could say that I…..oh forget it! I am getting away from the purpose of this blog.
This week we are having a wonderful surprise for Thanksgiving and Spencer's 6th birthday. Meghan will be flying in on Wednesday evening. The boys are going to be so thrilled. I have not told them yet. I am not going to. They will find out at the airport. I love surprises and am so happy to have Meghan visit.
Yay! For Meghan!
Today at church the priest said something in his homily about the 'stupid' commentary that comes from the news media. I don't remember what it was about. Really, church is usually a blur. I can give you three lovely good reasons why.
Anyway, when the priest said the word 'stupid', Spencer looked over at me, his mouth agape.
I almost laughed out loud. He was shocked to hear the priest say stupid as we tell the kids it is not nice to say stupid. Spencer was sitting two kids over and literally leaned over and looked at me with that expression on his face. Priceless!
We had decided to go to the social hall after mass to have juice and cookies. The place was packed! It was birthday Sunday so everyone who had a birthday in November was there. I got the kids juice and myself coffee, then we sat down. The kids were eyeing the cake from across the room. No one was eating any yet. I didn't know what to think. At this point I didn't even know it was birthday Sunday.
After the kids finish their juice we are just sitting there among the throng of strangers and chaos, I decide to exit the building. On our way out I accidentally spill warm coffee on Gabes shirt and he begins to cry. I hug him and tell him I am sorry. Then a nice lady comes over and asks us if we are staying for cake. The kids eyes light up and I am thinking "thanks lady, I was just about to escape the madness". She then scoops up Gabriel and takes him over to show him the cake. Now she's done it! Sigh!
They begin the birthday introductions then everyone sings happy birthday followed by a mad rush for the cake. Now remember people, I am here alone with three kids who think they are going to get cake, BUT and it's a huge BUT, I am not willing to put myself through the agony of juggling three plates of cake, forks and napkins AND trying to keep the kids together AND by my side. I just can't do it. The cake line is too long!
I leave. The boys are dissappointed, but I reassure them we are getting donuts or cake on the way home. Gabriel does not take this news well. Remember, he got a close up view of the cake by nice lady who meant well. He protests by standing in the middle of the parking lot screaming.
I calmly walk over to him and lead him to the van. He simmered down and on our way to Walmart we went, which is a whole other story, but I have shared enough for the day. BUT I will say, the people at the walmart pharmacy are idiots!
On another note, this one is for Chris and Bill. Sorry no singing toddlers, but look!
The A&M fans!
